Does anyone know what’s happening?

It’s 40 minutes after the opening bell on the New York Stock Exchange and the Dow Jones index is down 505.95 points. This HAS to be the end of stock exchange trading as we know it. Why don’t they close down the exchange before people start jumping from windows? Forget about your and my paltry portfolios, what about the huge institutions who invest their zillions in the exchange

Pension and Insurance companies

What about your and my pension funds and life insurance policies who have globs of our money invested in exchanges and pay our monthly stipends from the proceeds of their investments? What about the huge banks who have invested their billions in the markets? What about the huge businesses whose value is crumbling into dust before their very eyes?

50 Minutes after the bell

The Dow is now down only 446 points. We picked up 59 points in 10 minutes, not a bad rate of increase in normal times.

60 Minutes after the bell

The Dow is now down only 464 points. It’s yo-yoing and making a messy looking graph. What’s happing too, I think, is that many players are seeing bargains, shares that have dropped to their lowest points in months and maybe even years and are starting to buy. I too see what look like bargains, but I am too scared to lose more than I am already losing by the general market fall, so I sit still and hope for the market to rise. Of course I could be waiting for the market to fall even further. Yes, you are correct, I am confused. Who isn’t?

90 Minutes after the bell

The market seems to have steadied at about 450 points down, a major fall at any time. On the upside the list of bargains grows and grows. The initiators of mass moves on particular nominated shares will get nowhere today. It’s a general shambles and in keeping with what’s going on around the world. Besides the countries, mostly scattered around the Mediterranean rim, in deep financial straits, there are many other countries in the throes of social uprisings and revolutions.

Social uprisings

North African countries are in what is being called the Arab Spring. Egypt, Libya, Yemen and Syria are all embroiled in social problems which will inevitably turn into economic problems as they spend good money on arms and ammunition quelling the rebellions. Most of the social uprisings have been fueled by their poor living conditions. With internet and satellite TV there are no secrets anymore. Anyone can see exactly how the other half or the other 90 percent live and want to get to that status themselves.

How to fix things

I don’t know and I suspect that no one actually knows. All the mavens, prophets and advisors are lost in the shifting sands of the stock exchange. What we need is some resolve and action on the part of everyone to put things right!

I can’t tell if this game is worthwhile

I get an email something like this every day: “Read This Entire Report Now, Timing is Critical Understand XXXX is completely different from ANY profile that I have done this ENTIRE year!! Why? Because, XXXX is a company that I will be profiling for weeks to come because I believe I have discovered the hottest China play that Wall Street has seen this year! Bold statement? – just read on and see why… I have to WARN YOU….. This stock has the potential to grab Wall Street by storm just like my NAZDAQ play handed investors 300% Gains in days!”

I follow up

I then look up the stock symbol to see its current value and then I look at the graph for the past months or the past year. The stock value is almost always below 50 cents, usually below 10 cents and my first thought is that I have to buy a huge quantity of shares in order to make a decent amount of money and then I wonder what the broker will say when he sees my order and then I drop all ideas of playing the game.

The game

The game is an easy one and it makes good sense. Someone, the initiator, picks a stock that has very little value and starts emailing the stock symbol with a note like that above, promising that the stock will rocket and a buyer can then sell and make a killing. The objective is to get thousands of people placing buying orders for millions of stocks thus pushing the price up. The initiator will be the first to sell, even at a small rise and before everyone else realizes that the price has stopped rising and that they should sell. The drop in price will instant and dramatic and the initiator and some other good thinkers will have made themselves hundreds and maybe thousands of dollars at the cost of a 2 phone calls and brokerage fees.

Supply and demand

It actually is a great game, based entirely on the theory of supply and demand and a long list of email addresses. If one were to play conservatively, say buying 5,000 shares and selling as soon as there is a 5 cent profit, it means you would be making $250 per game, about $1,000 per week, not bad for very little outlay. The risk is minimal. At worst, meaning you missed the “selling-moment”, you will be left holding 5,000 share which may even start breathing again one day in your lifetime.

Why don’t I?

I don’t know. It is very tempting. I get letters from a few different initiators and this morning, and what prompted this article, I even found one in my junk-mail box, meaning that someone has somehow acquired a mailing list and is zapping out emails as fast as he can. I’m sure that if he understands the game well he will make some money on his initiative. I think I’m going to try this…

Out on the ocean we’ll get away from everything

Gliding around sparkling waters has stellar appeal. You need not have the funds of a tycoon to enjoy a sailing holiday. For many, the allure isn’t just feeling the wind in your hair and the exhilaration of watching the sea slip by, but the escape from politics, commerce and technology combined with the means to explore a region in just a week or two.

Nothing else to do

With little else to do but sleep, read or swim, it’s the perfect way to put the wind back in your sails. Seeing a country from the water gives you a fresh perspective on a destination, and one that’s gained without queuing in traffic or fighting for space on the sand. If a beach is busy you can simply sail on to another. And when the landlubber in you takes over, pull into port and shop, eat or stroll around before taking to the waves once more.

Start at the French Riviera

France’s Mediterranean coast is dotted with marinas and harbors, from chic Monaco to cheerful Pézenas, the port for Montpellier. Essential Sailing (0845 653 0126; www.essentialsailing.com) has fully crewed one-week trips along the French Riviera They start and end at the firm’s base at La Napoule, calling at ports such as Menton, St-Tropez and Cannes. Prices, excluding flights or trains, start at $1,850 per person based on six sharing, including transfers, onboard accommodation, most meals and drinks.

Grand designs

Step aboard the Beluga, the 28-metre Turkish gulet belonging to the designer and hotelier Anouska Hempel. Until October the vessel is available for charter along the coastlines of Croatia and Montenegro through Dalmatian Destinations (0333 700 8007; www.dalmatiandestinations.com). A week starts at $50,000 for up to seven guests, including the crew and all meals but not flights. Trips start in either Split or Dubrovnik and are available until the end of October.

Baltic banquet

Each autumn, West Sweden’s coastline celebrates its lobsters, oysters, mussels, crayfish and prawns with a “Shellfish Journey” festival (www.vast sverige.com). On certain weekends in October, you can also join a new, two-night sailing adventure aboard a racing yacht (00 46 31 29 19 89; farr65r. com), fuelling up on gourmet seafood along the way. Trips cost $750 per person, including two nights’ yacht accommodation, all breakfasts and lunches and a lobster party at Bjorholmen. Gothenburg is around 30 miles away, and has plenty of flights.

Learn at leisure

Never sailed? For beginners unsure about how they will take to the open water, the Neilson “Stay and Sail” concept may appeal. You spend a week at one of the firm’s Beachclub activity resorts in southern Turkey or Greece, while the second week is spent afloat. As an extra temptation for September and October departures, a four-day sail-training course during week one is thrown in free. The costs: $1250 based on four sharing, or $1530 for two sharing. The price includes a week’s full board (apart from three evening meals) at the Beachclub, and self-catering aboard the yacht.

The stock exchange

What and where is that?

Is my money still there?

Last Wednesday I had a fairly respectable and profitable stock portfolio of about $11,900. I was starting to dream about breaking my mental $12,000 barrier. Thursday ended with me looking glumly at $11,380. What’s going on, I wondered. Friday made me feel a little more confident as I finished at $11,430 and I spent quite a relaxed weekend. Just as well, because I needed all my strength for Monday when I watched things change dramatically. The day ended at $10,800 and I spent a sleepless night.

Came Tuesday

I’d prefer to forget all about Tuesday. I sat and watched the Dow dropping like a stone, trying not to convert the Dow into my personal losses, not an easy thing to do. Later I went to the kitchen, made cup of coffee, added a shot of Johnnie Walker and staggered back to the TV set. The Dow was rising as though it was on an elastic string connected to heaven. I sat mesmerized, forgot the coffee and switched to Johnnie Walker straight. I went to bed happy.

Now it’s Wednesday

I waited for the market to open with bated breath and I wasn’t surprised to see it plunge. The truth is that I still don’t believe what I saw at the end of Tuesday. It’s stopped yo-yoing now and has settled down around the 10,900 index. Remember how we prayed to help it climb over the 12,000 level.

What I have learned about the stock exchange

• There is no such an animal as a stock exchange expert.

• No-one really understands the stock exchange.

• All the analysts, forecasters, advisers, and consultants do not know what is happening. They are as surprised and as confused as I am.

• Everyone is very nervous.

• No one knows what to do – should I buy or sell?

The stock exchange experts

The reaction of the experts to the current chaos is fascinating. About 50 percent of them are shouting “See, I told you it was going to crash!” and about 50 percent of them are shouting, “Hey, this is a great time to buy!” There is so much hysterical advice going around that it has all meshed into one grey mass of sound and nothing can actually be heard, which is just as well.

Why am I here?

The most important thing I have learned is that I should not be within a 100 miles of the nearest stock exchange. Neither should I have a penny invested in a share whether it be blue-chip or any kind of chip. I should never read the stock exchange news and I should never even talk about the stock exchange. I should leave all that to the experts, right?

So where should I be?

A casino is a good place or if there isn’t one nearby, standing next to a lotto stall. A regular automatic ticket on a 6 out of 49 Lotto draw will give me a chance of 1 in about 13 million. I’m not getting that on the stock exchange!

My broker
Today the term, “my broker” means something entirely different than it did 20 years ago. A few decades ago, having a broker usually meant having a relationship with a human who would help you manage your portfolio and select stocks. These human, “full service” brokers still exist and serve many people. But things have changed.

Brokerage firms
The giant brokerage firms like TD Ameritrade, Charles Schwab, Fidelity and E-Trade allow just about anyone to create a brokerage account. Once you set up a brokerage account, usually just a matter of filling out some information about yourself online and then funding your account. You can fund, or put money into your brokerage account, by transferring cash from your checking or savings accounts, either by writing a check or doing it electronically.

Now you have a broker
Once you do that, you can say you have a broker. And luckily, thanks to cost-savings powered by technology and competition, having a broker is more accessible than ever.
Most of the major and even the smaller brokerage firms have all but done away with minimum deposits. That means if you only have a few hundred dollars you can save your money in your brokerage account and start buying stocks and investing.

U.S. brokerage firms
Here is a list of some noteworthy U.S. brokerage firms and the minimum balances they require to open an account:
• Charles Schwab, $1,000 (for most account types)
• E-Trade, $500
• Fidelity, $2,500
• FirsTrade, None
• FolioFN, None
• ING Direct Sharebuilder, None
• Scottrade, $500
• TD Ameritrade, None
• TradeKing, None
• Vanguard, $3,000
• Zecco, None

Commissions
Keep in mind that while many large brokers may not have a minimum deposit, they do charge commissions for many transactions. Even a seemingly small $7 a trade commission can be pretty costly with a small account. A $7 commission is 7% of a $100 account.

No initial deposit
If you are starting small, you’ll want to consider brokerages that not only have no minimum initial deposit, but also offer commission-free mutual funds and exchange-traded funds. Fidelity, Schwab, Scotttrade, TD Ameritrade and Vanguard all offer a broad family of ETFs that you can buy without paying any commission.

Electronic brokers
I use a company called Interactive Brokers. There was no initial fee and they charge $1 per trade, which means I am trading for virtually nothing.

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